Big, Tall, and Ready to Haul

By Scott Corlett

In the late 1990s, many soccer moms who had been driving Volvo’s big, bland, but supersafe wagons suddenly decided that they were insufficient transportation for the hazardous terrain between the grocery store and the elementary school. The design and engineering teams at Ford’s Swedish outpost responded by creating a vehicle that both fulfills Volvo’s reputation for ultrasafe cars and meets suburban mothers’ desire for high-profile, off-road-capable SUVs.  The resulting XC90 is quite an accomplishment since vehicles with higher centers of gravity, such as SUVs and pickups, are inherently more susceptible to rollover accidents. This SUV is worthy of the Volvo insignia.

We admit that we are partial to big, tall Swedes. That fondness intensified when our 2006 Volvo XC90 V8 test car arrived just in time to ferry a load from our storage locker to our apartment in San Francisco. We had planned to rent a cargo van for this task but, as we folded down the second and third rows of seating in the XC90 and a cavernous cargo space opened before us, we realized that we had a hauler already in hand. The Volvo’s sumptuous leather appointments, frigid air conditioning, and iPod-capable radio made for one sweet U-Haul. We were both amazed and delighted when our 52-inch-tall queen headboard laid flat on the cargo compartment floor. We then just kept feeding that hungry XC90 – the remainder of the bed frame, box after box of power tools, a 3’-by-3’ skylight, six folding sawhorses…we thought we would never sate the beast. Finally, sweaty and our bill of lading complete, we climbed in, started the XC90, maxed the AC, shifted the six-speed automatic transmission into big D, and headed for the nearest fast-food restaurant. We guzzled an icy-cold coke and hoped our next haul in the XC90 would involve our skis and roads snowy enough to make use of the V-8’s standard AWD.

Five…Six…Eight…Who do we appreciate? The XC90’s designers knew from the get-go that size matters. In 2005, they acknowledged that performance counts too and offered a Yamaha-sourced 4.4-liter V-8 engine along with the existing T5 and T6 engines (turbocharged five- and six-cylinder units, respectively). The T6 was cut for ‘06 leaving a wide gap in performance between the lackluster 208-hp T5 and the muscular 311-hp normally aspirated V-8. The choice between those two engines is clearer than the stars above the Swedish arctic circle. The V-8, with ample power across its rev range, provides the raw acceleration you need to charge down freeway onramps and up San Francisco’s hills. We do expect more from the steering in a vehicle with a base price of $45,840. The steering wheel has far too much play and offers only veiled hints of road surface conditions.

The name Volvo is derived from the Latin for “I roll.” Since SUVs, with their high centers of gravity, are more likely than normal cars to roll over during abrupt turning maneuvers, the name takes on a meaning neither intended by Volvo’s founders nor appropriate to the XC90. As you would expect, Volvo’s safety-obsessed engineers have equipped the seven-passenger XC90 V8 with plenty of features to keep its four wheels on the ground. In fact, the XC90’s list of standard safety systems has more mnemonics than an ad in the personal pages. Key among these is the standard DSTC or Dynamic Stability and Traction Control system which uses the ABS sensors to brake individual wheels as needed to compensate for adverse road conditions or sudden evasive maneuvers. Should the collision avoidance systems prove insufficient, the XC90’s plethora of airbags, its heavily reinforced frame, and its strategically placed crumple zones make this one of the safest SUVs on the market. The XC90 V8 has curtain and side-impact airbags for all three rows of seating and frontal airbags for both driver and front passenger.

The 2006 XC90 V8 continues Volvo’s long history of producing very safe cars. The list of standard equipment is impressive though there is one glaring omission. Perhaps seeking amusement on a particularly cold and dark winter day, the Swedes sadistically left the Rear Parking Assist system out of the standard kit. In this goliath, we yearn for parking assistance in all directions. Otherwise, the XC90 is an admirable hauler of everything from ski buddies to kitchen sinks, not to mention ten-year-old soccer players. Once again, mom knows best.

Volvo is a gay-friendly company.

Get a free gay-friendly insurance quote for a 2006 Volvo XC90

Find a Volvo Dealer Near You

Read other Volvo reviews by Gaywheels.com’s writers

Get gay-friendly financing