2008 Subaru Tribeca

A More Benign Tribeca

We had the divine pleasure of speaking with over very own Ms. Cocoa Efficient about the new and improved 2008 Subaru Tribeca.
Gaywheels.com: Ms. Cocoa Efficient…welcome. Are you ready for your debut?
Cocoa Efficient: I was born ready!! I was also born a blond, but don’t tell anyone
Gaywheels.com: May we call you Effie?
Cocoa Efficient: You can call me whatever you like. Just so long as you call me a cab when we’re through.

Gaywheels.com: Lovely…spoken like a true lady. We asked for you for this chat review…because we needed an expert on transformations. Specifically, the benefits of a little lift here, a tuck there. And in our world, that applies to the new 2008 Subaru Tribeca which just went under the knife and emerged with a new face and tightened derriere.
Cocoa Efficient: Oh my, yes…she went in looking like an awkward Edsel and came out looking like a Chrysler clone. But, I feel the Tribeca shopper isn’t as concerned with outward appearances, as they are with capability.
Gaywheels.com: But let’s be honest, the outgoing B9 Tribeca was a design only a mother could love.
Cocoa Efficient: Look at this way. When a man is looking for a wife, he wants hot looks and big boobs. But when he’s looking to start a family, its all about child bearing hips, you see? The Tribeca doesn’t have to be a super model because its attributes are all about safety and passenger capacity.

Gaywheels.com: Interesting perspective. So the latest makeover, done very quickly after the car’s debut mind you, didn’t result in a Hooter’s girl on wheels but makes the Tribeca more respectable….or mainstream
Cocoa Efficient: Exactly
Gaywheels.com: We agree that the new exterior is an improvement but what about the way it drives….The Tribeca got a new engine and
tranny during this update…Did I just say tranny? Sorry Ms. Cocoa.
Cocoa Efficient: It is fine, darling. Just so long as you don’t say Granny Tranny

Yes, the new engine and transmission are a vast improvement over the previous unit. With bigger and more powerful competitors, such as the GMC Acadia, now entering the segment, the Tribeca needs to be as competitive as possible. Thankfully, the new engine doesn’t see a significant drop in fuel economy, a nice touch I think for the family on tight budget.
Gaywheels.com: So, Ms. Cocoa…who will buy the new Tribeca? You keep mentioning family and I assume you use that term in the traditional sense – parents with children.
Cocoa Efficient: Yes, or drag queens with cats. Same thing.
Gaywheels.com: Why is the Tribeca a great family car? And better yet, why is it better than others in the segment?
Cocoa Efficient: The Tribeca is perfect for young families, but it also can serve as a comfortable adult transport for those who regularly shuffle friends or clients. The seven–passenger model offers a third-row seat that can actually
accommodate two moderately-sized adults, but most tall folk will want to opt for the second row or ride shotgun.

Gaywheels.com: The one thing that I love about the car is the interior. Subaru gave in to the critics with the exterior design but didn’t change much about the Jetson-esque interior.
Cocoa Efficient: It is very hip. The dashboard has more curves than Ginger from Gilligan’s Island. I love the design, but I did find some of the buttons were difficult to see as they wrap around the center console away from the driver. I also notice some of the electroluminescent readouts washout when view through polarized lenses. I must give props to the very comfortable and WIDE seating, the long list of creature comforts and of course the excellent nine-speaker audio system.
Gaywheels.com: Speaking of curves, I was really impressed with the way the Tribeca handled the curves on the mountain roads outside of Palm Springs. She’ll never be a sports car but it was certainly nice to know that Subaru’s symmetrical AWD was there for me. This should be especially attractive to those of us who live in climates where we actually have weather.
Cocoa Efficient: Lovely segue darling. Yes, the handling was quite surprising, especially given the Tribeca’s 8-plus inches (UH, don’t we all wish) of ground clearance. In the world of crossover SUVs, I would say the Tribeca’s ride and handling are right up there with the much more expensive Acura MDX and far and away better than any truck-based SUV I’ve driven. Very car like.
Gaywheels.com: Ok, we have a new benign exterior, a still-sexy interior, new engine and transmission….what’s not to love?
Cocoa Efficient: It is in the $30-40K range, which is pricey until you consider the standard features, safety ratings and standard all-wheel drive. Then it fits right in with competitors such as the Saturn Outlook and Chrysler Pacifica, but costs a bit more than Ford’s new Taurus X.
Gaywheels.com: Thank you Ms. Efficient. As always, it has been a pleasure. We are looking forward to introducing the “Drag Queen Factor” one day on the site – where we rank cars on hair room and lighting.
Cocoa Efficient: Well, if someone ever designs an entire interior out of tile mirror and a single 60-watt soft bulb, it will be the perfect Drag Queen car.