Last Call: 2015 Dodge Charger Is So Gay We Asked For Sloppy Seconds

If you live where snow and ice are common but you absolutely have to have a sportscar that’s functional and practical, the clear winner for the Year of the Sheep (or 2015, according to the Chinese calendar) is the 2015 Dodge Charger. Standard with Rear-Wheel Drive, be sure to upgrade to All-Wheel Drive and you’ll have a car that handles well in snow, ice and on the racetrack. The Charger is a little bit nice, a whole lot of naughty and perfect for anyone who really likes a gift that is for pure enjoyment and little redeeming social value.

I just absolutely love the Dodge Charger in its latest incarnation, as evidenced by my glow stick review of the car earlier this year. It almost seems impractical to put AWD on a sportscar. Well, actually, the Charger isn’t really a sportscar, but it is a muscle car, and this year marks the return of muscle to the auto world, as evidenced by the Chevy Camaro being crowned Car of the Year by Motor Trend. Unlike prior years, when sportscars served no practical day-to-day purpose, even if you were a racecar driver, today’s muscle cars are practical, economical (for the class) and safe. And luxurious, which is really not the sportscar of yore, when a nice interior meant that you were afraid to get dirt or blood on it.

The only real drawback to the Dodge Charger is the passenger space in back. Last time I drove it, I was having so much fun with it that I forgot to climb in the rear seats to see how the occasional grandpa I pick up would fit in back. For me, it was a little tight, though I have gotten use to the back seat ease of many other four-doors that don’t seek to give you a thrill. If your grandpa is relatively limber and not a heavyweight, you should be able to get him and his walker in the back seats just fine. Just be careful if the Charger will be long-distance transportation to a Girth and Mirth event. I love those guys and I want to give them all the space they need.

The sticker for the AWD Charger is about $31K, which is a little steep but if you are looking at this car, you want that speed / safety combination that you know you deserve and hopefully you can afford. The Charger is consider a large sedan, which I don’t get because it seems rather midsized me; maybe my sense of size and girth has gotten skewed over the years. For all of you who really want to go over the top with Muscles, just as Diana Ross used to sing, there is a Hellcat version that comes with a supercharged V8 6.2-liter engine that gives off 707 horses of power. Yikes, that really would win the drag race, wouldn’t it…?

Ultimately, when buying a car, it’s important to get what you want, regardless of what anyone else thinks (except maybe your spouse). The Dodge Charger won’t appeal to everyone, just as a Porsche would not appeal to everyone (trust me, there are people like that). Here’s a hint: if you like the fast music playing in your head and want a car to match the soundtrack, check out the 2015 Dodge Charger.