We’ve all been on those dates where we can honestly say we had a decent time but nothing happened that made us want to start sharing photos on Instagram. That was basically my wet, winter weekend with the 2015 GMC Canyon. Nice kid, to be sure, and he didn’t leave me stuck in a ditch. But, seriously, I shaved my back hair for this?
And yet, it would seem like the whole automotive worldwide web has crowned the GMC Canyon as the darling of the compact pickup sub-genre for this Back to the Future year of 2015. In other words, notables like Edmunds.com says that “combined with a more refined interior and the latest technology, it’s now the most advanced midsize pickup you can buy.” Forbes Magazine (a.k.a. goofy billionaire Steve Forbes, whose father Malcolm Forbes was a big flamer and Elizabeth Taylor gal pal) gushes, “GM has set a new benchmark in the midsize truck category”. Even Autoblog.com, that metrosexual-bisexual blog of the auto blog world, proclaims, “GMC really is breaking new ground for a truck segment that has mostly existed for value shoppers, thus far.”
First, it’s important to note that in this category of pickup trucks, ‘midsize’ and ‘compact’ are basically one in the same. Whereas a midsize car really is different from a compact car, when you get into this category of big boys, it’s sorta like quibbling between 3XXX and 4XXXX. It’s still a truck, and you can still do all kinds of truck-y things with the midsized/compact Canyon, like throw a redneck hot tub party or shoot a Deliverance-style gay porno. For what it’s worth, I couldn’t see how it was any smaller than a Titan or an F-150. Maybe I’m not such a size queen after all.
Indeed, the GMC Canyon is all new and has been completely redesigned for 2015 (sans hover board from Back to the Future II). Both inline-4 and V-6 engines are available, and you can finally get a full 8-inch touchscreen to let your fingers do the walking while the Canyon does the driving. The interior is très classy, offering a smooth-but-not-plastic dash and doors that look nice and should remain nice for at least a few years. The seats are truly comfortable, adjusting as needed for your height, girth or romantic desires. With the Crew Cab, there is about 36 cubic inches of legroom and a little over 38 cubic inches of headroom in back. Hey, my friends and acquaintances were happy.
U.S. News and World Report, which looks at all web automotive reviews and compiles them for easy digestion, notes that reviewers feel the 2015 Canyon is “balanced” and “quiet” when on the road – not such a bad thing in a pickup, human or otherwise – and that it has “one of the most opulent interiors in the class.” The Canyon tied for first place in a category with a total of just four entrants – hey, at Miss Drag World, that’s more than enough to take the tiara, gowns and all the schwag.
Okay, okay, it’s a nice truck, yet I do like how Car and Driver summed it up: “GM says the Canyon is the ‘premium truck in the segment,’ which, given its distinct lack of competitors, is a bit like saying that Google is a popular search engine.” Fair enough, and my preferred choice in search is still (and for the foreseeable future will be) Google. So, yes, when I’m in the mood for a midsize or compact truck – or a 3XXX or a 4XXXX – the Canyon is the crew cab for me.
Speaking of fairness, I can tell you that the 2015 Canyon does very well on the highway. Whereas many trucks can be bouncy and uncertain, the Canyon maintained speed and smoothness and did not seem jittery until I tried to switch from satellite radio to my iPod Shuffle – and tip over my ginger bear latte in the process (gingerbread?). My excursion down to Colorado Springs did not yield the sugar-free plum fairy jam I wanted for stocking stuffers, but the smoothness of the Canyon made the trip nonetheless uneventful in a good way. And safe.
Perhaps the key point here is that if you want a midsize or compact truck (not a big bruiser or cruise liner), you will have a choice between the GMC Canyon, the Chevy Colorado, the Toyota Tacoma or the Nissan Frontier. I’ve driven them all and all are good trucks (to me, the Canyon and the Colorado are basically the same truck). I’ve never been in the market for a midsized truck, so I can’t say that I can see any great distinction between them all. Indeed, when it comes to big powerful travelers that impress, I want to take them all home and play with them over and over again. And I still won’t be able to make up my mind. But for those of you who have made up your mind, now – Winter – is a great time to be looking for a new truck, so click here for some advice on just how to do that.
I’ve often complained how I hate when cars are called the XYZ300 or the MSDOS10. Cars should have names, not numbers. So I applaud that we can still choose between the Canyon, Colorado, Frontier or Tundra. Sure, those names are not as snazzy as Impala or Challenger, but they are a step up from, say, the 2015 Gazelle, Drone or Meerkat. Leave it to truck makers to make The Name Game (Shirley, Shirley, Bo Burly) a simple one.
Now if we could just get some simple names and not confusing numbers from our elected leaders…..