For a big truck that weighs almost two tons (depending on trim), the 2016 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off Road is relatively inexpensive, starting at just under $31,000. And even the top line bigger-than-your-last-boyfriend’s-bulge big truck, with a double cab upfront and 4-Wheel Drive, you can still come in under $34,000. If you want or need a truck and want one that can go off-road on a dime, this truck should be on your short list.

Yes, giggle if you must, because I did: I still don’t know why Toyota keeps with the acronym TRD. It stands for Toyota Racing Development, a special kind of Dexter’s Laboratory of racing and fine tuning and precision that Toyota created a few years back. It’s some pretty impressive stuff that really is like a Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval for car enthusiasts who are also speed freaks and engine exhaust heads. The moniker TRD assures buyers that the Toyota Tacoma is great off-road and great on the road with smooth transitions and pep and spunk when needed.

Everything you can think of or want in this big TRD is available, again from $31K to $34K approximately. It’s available with a manual or an automatic transmission, depending upon how you (or your significant other) like to drive. It’s completely redesigned for 2016, and all the little accouterments that have been added and changed make the Tacoma a truck that is more gay IMHO. The grille, for example, is a lot more ‘silver’ and has a lot more bling. The headlights are smaller this year but are more, I dunno, 21^st Century: less Thomas Edison filament and more LED earth-friendly … you know, like at your favorite gay hipster bar.

Style-wise, the body lines and curves are both sharper and smoother at the same time. Basically, it’s a new softer-yet-bolder style that is new for the masses but old hat for us gays who were hip long before everyone else decided that we are indeed the few, the chosen, the glamorous. Black, Super White or Barcelona Red (sounds like a test audience for the Oscar studios, ya?) are just three of the basic exterior colors available. Other changes and upgrades may not necessarily be noticeable. Take a good look at the 2016 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off-road to see if you can see yourself driving it. You probably can – problem solved.

The bottom line is the same as the top line. Looking for a truck and an off-road vehicle rolled up into something that is both butch and fem and all-around fabulous? Take the 2016 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off-Road for a test drive off the beaten path. Just make sure your road doesn’t contain thousands of little pebbles that, when hurled at you, can really cause a lot of damage, even to a Two Ton Tessie like the Tacoma. Those little pebbles, like small-minded big-mouthed people, can easily destroy what should have otherwise been smooth and effortless….

… like Jeb Bush’s efforts to win the Republican nomination.