You can read part one of Sam’s review of the 2017 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off-Road here.

Okay, okay, I know I look great in a truck, but for some reason, no one really believes that I know how to drive one.  Well, for your information, I know men who know about trucks, and that has always worked well for me. And all the men in my life agree that the 2017 Toyota Tacoma TRD Off-Road is the truck for those who really do use and need a truck…and need an off-road vehicle that isn’t just pretty or smooth on a soft gravel road.

This truck trim starts around $32K, which is about eight-grand less than where the TRD Pro (which also goes off-road) starts. Whereas the TRD Pro is a flashy show pony with a lot of impressive bells and whistles, the TRD Off-Road is a bit more stripped-down.  Think of it as the handsome tough guy in just his tighty-whities, while the TRD Pro is the butch man in skimpy and sizzling underwear. When it comes to performance, you’ll want to drive them both.

Just look at the TRD Off-Road (and Pro) and you will see that all the action is below the waistline. Knobby all-terrain tires on 16-inch alloy wheels. It’s a stance that may seem out-of-place in ordinary traffic (as a man in tighty-whities might appear), yet you can’t help but be attracted. You have to wonder what it can do if given the chance. Basically, what you have here is a truck that is ready to go off-road. And ready to go to work.  Even the most gorgeous men in the world rarely come as that kind of combo meal.

In many ways, the TRD Off-Road trim is the same as the TRD Sport, which admittedly, is a lot like the TRD Pro.  Pricing varies and the details are numerous, and depending on your budget and color palette, you will want to test-drive them all. Or special order it. Okay, don’t even think about this truck unless you have some disposable funds. (FYI, dropping out of college does not suddenly free up your money.)

To be sure, this is a gay truck. An LGTB truck.  A TLGQBI truck.  Many a gay man who has one, however, does not see it as a gay truck, even as the Lady Gaga music fills the cabin.  So, in all fairness, the 2017 TRD Off-Road is a butch hetero truck too, and here’s proof:

My friend and fellow reviewer Tim Esterdahl got the chance to test-drive the TRD Off-Road in Hawaii.  It’s the best-selling vehicle, truck or car, in Hawaii because it handles well on all the rough tropical roads that await people who can afford a parking space for it. I trust Tim’s opinion, because had Toyota flown me to Hawaii (with my fabulous collection of Hawaiian shirts), I’m not sure I would have gotten beyond the hotel bar that overlooks the Blue Hawaiian ocean. It’s too beautiful out there to work, for me anyway.  Tim works hard at his job as a truck reviewer, wherever that may take him.  I work hard too (wink), but why reinvent the wheel?  Click here for Tim’s full review, which comes without the traditional Hawaiian Spam sandwich.

I will admit that as a very young boy, I did not play with toy trucks but instead pretended I was a banker or a go-go dancer or a disc jockey. Yet I’ve always enjoyed watching other boys play with trucks, admiring how such an inanimate object could give them such automatic prowess. A truck can really bring out the butchness in everyone, man, woman or beast.

What’s not to like about something that can do what forced heterosexuality has never been able to do?